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Last Song by blue_angel36

Kimi ni Aitakute

A/N

Okay, I had this idea when I watched the video for Gackt's "Last Song" and I swear, it made my cry. This is basically a short fic using songs from Gackt, the more loving ones, and they will fit a story of love lost and love found again. The first song is "Kimi ni Aitakute" or "I Want to See You". I'll have both Japanese and English lyrics. Now enjoy! (Oh, and the songs will be from Sesshoumaru's point of view, even if they're in a "Kagome" section of the chapter.)

Waiting.

That's what Taisho Sesshoumaru, heir to one of Japan's largest medical corporations, was doing. He was waiting. Waiting for a miracle that would never happen and waiting for the presence he had learned to love. He sat in the front entryway of his large estate, his seat a lone chair amongst the overturned chairs, tables, and shattered glass. It looked as though a tornado had blown through the entire manor, turning everything upside down and inside out.

And all because he, the heartless Sesshoumaru, had learned how to love.

kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute

mou ichido kono te o tsunaide hoshii

I want to see you I want to see you more than anyone

Once more, I want you to hold my hand

The only thing untouched was a room just off the side, the doors thrown open. It was his music room, his sanctuary. Stacks of blank music sheets were on a large cheery wood desk at the far side of the room, a large grand piano just a few feet away. The room was a picture of perfection compared to the rest of the house and looked rarely used. When in truth, it was probably the most used room in the house.

But at the present time it was empty, the only evidence of it being used recently was the much smaller stack of sheet music that had notes scribbled on them in a very feminine form of handwriting.

"Sesshoumaru-sama? Might I bring you some tea my Lord?" But the young man was ignored as Sesshoumaru simply stood in one fluid motion and walked quietly into the music room, shutting the large wooden doors with a soft "click". The young male who had spoke turned to his counterpart, his twin, with a strange look on his face.

"Ah, Sesshoumaru-sama has taken the leave of the Lady very difficultly. Perhaps we should..." But Ah shook his head, his brown hair with its white streaks flowing around his face as he did so.

"I think it is best if we simply leave him to his devices Un. The Lord is feeling loss, umong other things, for the first time in years. He must cope with it himself." Un looked like he wanted to argue, but he was silenced by his twin's stern look and both twins simply turned and walked deeper into the manor, deciding to simply clean the mess everything was currently in.

The manor was silent for several minutes apart from Ah and Un shuffling through the debris. Then, like someone had suddenly flicked a switch, music began to come from the sanctuary of the estate's Lord.

kono heya ni mada okiwasureta kimi no omokage o sagashiteiru yo

me o tojireba ima mo kimi ga soba ni iru you na ki ga shite

itsuka wa atarimae no you ni

wakare ga kuru koto wakatteita no ni

I'm looking for vestages of your presence still left over in this room

If I close my eyes, even now I can almost feel you next to me

I always took it for granted

Even though I knew that we would part

As the sounds of several notes, sung lyrics, ruffling papers, and other such things were heard in the nearly empty manor, mournful sobbing was heard elsewhere, nearly fifty miles away and gaining.

The woman was driving in her silver Mustang, her stereo off and her engine roaring as she sped over the road in the light of the setting sun. Her broken, keening sobs echoed in the vehicle and her crystalline tears rolled down her cheeks and blurred her vision. She knew it was dangerous to drive in such a reckless fashion, especially with a strong storm rapidly headed towards land from the sea, but Higurashi Kagome found she could care less about the danger for herself.

She felt so horribly broken inside, as though someone had actually smashed everything she was with a sledgehammer and left her to die alone and in despair. Never, not even after the death of her dear father, had she felt such an incredible pain, and she had never thought she could. But she now knew that what one thought, was not nessisarily true.

Such as she had "thought" that her fiancee was working late all those times, just as he had told her. But she now knew that to be untrue. He'd been busy, that was true, but he certainly wasn't alone in his office slaving over paperwork. She'd been such a fool, to trust another so much and hold them so dearly that one act made her feel as though the world had rained down upon her, and then some.

Kagome was startled out of her bleak thoughts when her cellphone rang. Scrambling to reach it within her black duster, she kept her eyes on the road, though her vision was still terribly blurred. When she finally reached her cellphone, she didn't even bother to look at the caller ID before answering.

kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute

wasureru koto nante deki ya shinai kara

kimi ga mienakute nando mo kizutsuketa keredo

mou ichido kono te o tsunaide hoshii

I want to see you I want to see you more than anyone

I simply cannot forget about you

I cannot see you I've hurt you so many times, but

Once more, I want you to hold my hand

"I don't want to talk to you...just...just leave me alone Sesshoumaru..."

"Kagome-chan?" Kagome gasped at the young female's voice and nearly swerved off the road in her shock.

"Rin...gomen...I did not realize it was you..." She inwardly cursed how much her voice shaked and how her breath came out in harsh gasps.

"Kagome, what happened? Onegai, you must tell me! What has my father done?!" Kagome could feel the words in her throat as she continued to drive, but they wouldn't come out. Then, she suddenly felt another broken, keening sound come from her as she leaned over the wheel and actually took her eyes off the road. "Kagome? Kagome! Onegai, talk to me!"

"Rin...he...affair...lied..."

"Kagome, I can't understand you!" But Kagome's answer didn't come. The only thing that came over the cellphone was a piercing scream and the loud crash of metal on metal.

"Sesshoumaru-sama? Your meal is ready m'Lord." The aging man recieved no answer, and he nearly walked into the music room before he was stopped by a somber looking Ah, with an equally upset Un behind him.

"Jaken, it would be best to leave him be." The old man snorted.

"Ha! You know nothing brat! Now let me go before..."

"Kagome-sama left him Jaken." Jaken froze and looked up at Un, thinking it to be one of the young teen's typical pranks, but he found all truth in the youngsters slightly bloodshot eyes. Apparently the young man had been crying.

"Ah? Un? Is this true?" Both nodded.

"Hai."

"How? Why? I do not..." But Ah cut him off.

"I'm afraid, Jaken, that it is not our place to discuss such things." Jaken seemed to understand, for he simply turned and looked at the doors to the music room with a gloomy expression on his face, finally noticing the sounds that indicated that their master was working at something.

deatta shunkan ni koi ni ochite omowazu kimi o dakishimeteita

sonna boku ni warainagara "baka ne" to karuku kisu o shite...

daremo ga deai to wakare no naka de

tashika na ai ni kizuiteiku

The moment we met, I fell in love and without thinking, I hugged you

You laughed at me and said "You silly" and gently kissed me...

From the time they meet until the time they part

No one realizes true love

"He shall most likely work on that piece until it's finsihed or until he nearly dies from thirst or hunger." Ah and Un nodded in agreement, knowing whatever was being composed by their lord was for the Lady Kagome. For they knew that for their lord it was difficult to speak his feelings or thoughts, and that anything he deamed worth saying, was said in music. But all three men turned at once when the front doors, finally being shut after simply being open for several hours, swung open once more to reveal a very haggard and destressed teen.

"Young mistress! You have returned early from your..."

"Where's my father?!" All three men flinched, not liking the tone in the young woman's voice at all.

"Now hold on a moment Rin..."

"No! Where is my father?!" Seeing that no one would help her, Rin simply walked towards them and began to yell out "father" as loud as she could possibly handle.

"Lady Rin! No!"

"Father!" The three men rushed foward and tried to hold her back, but she continued walking even though her pace was much slower. "Father!!!"

"Rin! You must leave him be!"

"Damn you, shut up! FATHER!!!" She finally reached the music room doors, knowing he'd be in there, and slammed them open with her face showing her undeniable anger. But as she walked in, she suddenly stopped with her eyes wide and a gasp that echoed in the large, dark room.

The once clean, organized room was completely destroyed. Sheet music was crumpled and in pieces all over the floor around the desk and grand piano, the usually open blinds were shut tight and ruffled heavily, and the furniture was either overturned or out of place. But what made her hault the most was the figure bent over the piano, barely moving except to play a few notes or to scribble something onto a sheet of music.

kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute

hajimete kimi ni atta hoshizora no shita de

kimi ni tsutaetai todokanai omoi demo

boku no kokoro wa mada kimi o sagashiteiru

I want to see you I want to see you more than anyone

The first time I met you underneath the starry sky

I want to tell you about the feelings that haven't reached you

My heart is still searching for you

"Father..." Her voice was quiet and awed, having never seen her adoptive father in such a dishelved manner, and she gasped again when he looked up at her with his golden eyes.

Tear-filled, golden eyes.

"Rin? What are you doing here so early?" Rin, who had been on the verge of backing down, suddnely swallowed deeply and took a few steps foward, the three men watcing helplessly behind from their spots sprawled on the floor.

"Father, what happened? What happened with Kagome-chan?" She saw his eyes widen and heard him hiss in a breath as he sat up a little straighter.

"She left Rin, and...and I'm not sure..."

"Shut up! What did you do!" Sesshoumaru actually looked shocked for the first time in years when his only child yelled at him, her voice angry and almost spiteful.

"Rin..."

"She's been in an accident Father! I was on the phone with her when it happened!" The room went dead silent for several minutes, the only sounds being the deep breaths from Rin in her attempt to not blow up.

"Accident...What kind of accident?" Rin felt herself deflate at his quiet tone, having never heard such a tone of voice come from him.

"It was a car wreck. She swerved into the other lane and was hit head on by a large truck before rolling three times and nearly going off the cliff."

"Is she..."

"She's alive. But barely. The doctors said she's in a coma that...that...Father, Kagome-chan may never wake up." In that moment, as the words slowly came from his daughter's mouth, Sesshoumaru felt as though his world had been destoryed.

And his soul seemed to die as Rin's quiet sobs began to echo in the dark room.

"My Lord, shall I ready your car for you?" But Sesshoumaru, who's expression was oddly blank, simply turned to the piano and began to place once more and scribble notes.

"No, that will not be needed Ah. She does not need me to further destroy her life should she surive this." Rin's outraged cry of anger echoed in the manor as she tried to run to her father's side, but was pulled out of the room by Ah and Un. Even once the door shut, her screams and yells echoed loudly into his ears and he suddenly froze. That's when it call came rushing at him and he placed his elbows on the wood of the grand paino and layed his face in his hands as his shoulders began to shake with silent sobs.

He, Taisho Sesshoumaru, cried for the first time in two decades.

itsuka wa atarimae no you ni

wakare ga kuru koto wakatteita no ni

I always took it for granted

Even though I knew that we would part

Rin stopped screaming as broken sobs made their way to her ears, the sobs of the man who had saved her. But suddenly his sobs into yells, practically howls, of what seemed to be agony. But it was not pain of the body. It was the pain fo the mind, the heart, and the soul that echoed in his cries as he lifted his head and let the heavens know of his pain. She couldn't make herself listen anymore, and Rin found herself fleeing out to where her car was parked. She threw herself into the driver's side and turned the ignition, bringing the engine to life with a roar that barely drowned out the other roar echoing from the manor. She peeled out of the drive, making gravel fly everywhere, before turning in the direction of the hospital when she reached the main road.

'Father...what have you done?'

Sesshoumaru simply sank to his knees admist the destruction in the music room, tears still run down his face as he sobbed quietly. Not since the death of his mother had he felt such despair, and he had never hoped to feel such things again. Only now it seemed so much worse and so much more painful to go through. He found he felt strangely empty, yet so full of pain he thought he'd explode.

kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute

wasureru koto nante deki ya shinai kara

kimi no tame nara sou kimi no tame nara...

I want to see you I want to see you more than anyone

I simply cannot forget about you

If it's for you Yes, if it's for you...

Finally, something seemed to awaken inside him. A deep hope, one born of love and desperation. He stood from his place on the floor and once more sat at the piano, his eyes wide with understanding. He would apologize. Should she ever wake up, he would apologize in the only way he knew how.

Through song.

He sat and began to let his hands lead him, playing note after note and harmony after harmony before he scribble them down onto paper. Several times he would look angry and crumple the sheet music, only to begin again with the thoughtful, hopeful look on his face. He would apologize, and she would forgive him. He would hold her small, dainty hand in his warmly once more. Even if his message took years to reach her, he would wait.

mou ichido kono te o tsunaide hoshii

itsumo tsunaida te wa atatakakatta

Once more, I want you to hold my hand

Your hand held in mine was always warm

**************************************

So? What did you guys think? I think I may come back and fix it up a little, but for now it's fine. I would love to recieve reviews on this one VERY much. I know I'm WAY behind on all my other writing, and I have writing, but all my files are at home on my slow-ass computer and my floppy disk(lame, I know) died on me. So for now, I'm working with no spell-checker and a much older typing program. But when I finally get a new floppy disk or I can send my stuff through e-mail (my dad's a weirdo about me using the internet at home), there will be a heavy rush of updates. Well, I'm gonna go eat something. I've been working at this none-stop without a break so yeah, I need food and something to drink. Prefferably something with caffine. XD

~Blue

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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