Through His Eyes by Nefra

Through His Eyes

Fear not, A New Enemy, A New Ally is in the process of being written. I've had this one shot on my comp for a while now and suddenly felt the urge to post it. This is a first time for me, writing in the first person. The entire fic is told from Sesshoumaru's point of view, no one else's...not even mine. I hope I stayed true to Sesshoumaru's personality in this one. Let me know what you all think and leave a review for me.

One Shot: Through His Eyes

Disclaimer: I do not own Inu Yasha.

The night is calm tonight. Rin and Jaken have fallen asleep but I am restless. My constant search for Naraku has led me to a place only a few miles away from my detested half-brother and his pack. I do not admit to anyone, even myself, why I never stray far from them. If I were to admit this feeling then I would seek them out and destroy their lives with one swift slash of my claws. However, deep down in the place where my true feelings reside, I know I could never hurt her. I have...become accustomed to seeing her with him; Inu Yasha. Her power is unlike any I have ever encountered. For a human she has much potential to do such great things.

I have watched her from afar many times, wondering what it is that compels me to seek her out. Her scent is pleasant to my nose, unlike most humans. It seems to have a permanent floral scent. Even covered in blood and gore her scent is still powerful enough to shine through the filth.

I feel the smile form on my face as I recall the first time I lay my eyes upon her. I had decided to seek out Inu Yasha once he was freed from his imprisonment by the first miko. I wanted Tetsusaiga but when I saw her standing behind him, I almost killed her for daring to capture my interest. She was a distraction, she was indecent in her short kimono and she was human. I had always believed that humans were a waste of time but I found myself taking interest in this one. She defied me with her words and her defense of the half-breed. She also defied me inside the tomb of my father by showing intelligence far above that of what I deemed to be normal in a human. When Tetsusaiga was pulled from its pedestal by her very human hand, I was angered beyond imagining. How could a mere human pull a sword that neither my dirty blooded half-brother nor I could even budge?

My anger was held in check and I brought myself back to reality, or so I thought. When I approached the girl, she held Tetsusaiga in front of her like a shield, the look in her eyes told me she knew the sword would protect her. On the other hand, perhaps I gave her too much credit. I attacked, believing that I had melted her within the bone prison. Moments later I was proven wrong when she emerged completely unharmed. She and my half-brother were both confused and wondered openly why she was not dead until the flea spoke informing them of the fang's power to protect humans. Things went downhill from there and I walked away from the battle with the loss of my left arm.

The next time I confronted them they had acquired two new members of their group a kitsune cub and a monk. The kit was useless, still too young to properly fight unwanted enemies. The monk was strong enough but even he had his weaknesses. That was the only time I ever soiled my presence with that of the vile Naraku. The only thing I had not prepared for was the strength of the girl. Once more, I underestimated her because she was human. She shot at me twice and I inwardly praised her for being brave yet so very stupid. The first arrow shot Tetsusaiga's blade, returning it to a rusted katana. The second arrow actually shattered my armor and under ordinary circumstances, I would have only left her with a warning. What angered me was the power that surrounded the arrow. That was when I first realized just how powerful this girl could become; she was of the miko line going back to Midoriko herself. I could tell that she was untrained and this made her dangerous. Most of those in the miko-hood were taught how to channel their energies for healing and purification. This girl was a natural miko and given time, she would destroy all of youkai kind if the whim struck her. Again, I attacked her, this time using Tetsusaiga but the half-breed rushed her to safety. Not long after that, I had no choice but to take my leave, Tetsusaiga once more taken beyond my grasp. However, I did not forget the miko or the enormous ability I sensed within her.

My gaze returns to the sky, in hopes that the stars above can give me a clue why I am even thinking about this. They merely twinkle in response as though laughing at my plight. I am reminded of the black diamonds around Toutousai's home and it brings to mind the next time I encountered them. They had found two more members by then; a strong Taijiya and her fire neko. Both were beneficial to the pack, being the warriors they were. I recall the way the old sword smith denied my request for a new sword then had the audacity to tell me my sword was just as powerful as Tetsusaiga. I nearly lost control and killed every one of them right then. By that time, I had come to terms with the enigma the girl had created within my mind and merely let it be. The hanyou once again defeated me utterly with his discovery of the Kaze no Kizu. That was when I met Rin. Our first few encounters were very brief. I tried to ignore the child but she kept returning to care for me. Her body was covered in bruises and I could smell blood on her small form. I could smell no other scents that would indicate a family. Like me, she was alone and I had planned to leave her as such until the scent of her blood reached me through the forest. I found her on the pathway that would have brought her to me, covered in the scent of wolves. You could not tell the original wounds from the new ones anymore. I almost left her there until Tensaiga demanded my attention. I answered its call and brought the child back from the dead; she has been faithful to me ever since.

Over the following weeks, I took care of her, not truly understanding why. Once she was clean, she was actually, what humans would call pretty. I chose to let her follow me, her constant antics against Jaken kept me amused. I protect her; she is mine to do with as I please. I know that I could kill her and she would still look at me with those adoring brown eyes. It was not until I discovered Inu Yasha's transformations that I saw the look the miko gave him. It was almost identical to the look Rin would give me but there were definite differences. The first time he transformed before me, I actually felt fear. I had pushed the sensation aside by the time we met again and I stopped him from destroying the countryside. The pang in my chest when the miko threw herself over Inu Yasha's body made me falter though I did not show it. Instead, I left them where they were to let the hanyou cope with what he had done.

I was still no closer to figuring out the riddle the miko had given me. The more I saw of her the more I felt something within me growing. I have spent many nights trying to reason why I feel this way when I see her. She has become stronger, much more so than my half brother's undead miko but there is still a frailty about her that I cannot fathom. I still remember smelling the most disgusting of scents mingled with that of her wonderful floral scent. I did not smell the hanyou so decided that now would be a good time to question her of Naraku's whereabouts. What I was not expecting was to see the poison user, Mukotsu they called him, attempting to mate with her, or marry as humans call it. The rage that built up within me was powerful to say the least. I destroyed him when he attacked me, accusing me of halting the proceedings of two people very much in love. Inwardly I became nauseated with his claims and dispatched him. I was surprised again when the miko thanked me for saving her. I, not wanting to appear weak, gave her my 'true' reasons for halting the ceremony. I did not realize at the time but I had fallen for her.

I sigh as her scent invades my nose once more and concentrate my power, letting the cloud form around my feet. I cannot believe I am going to see my half brother. There is more than one reason I am doing so but this time it is to join with them so we may defeat the hanyou Naraku. I am by no means weak, but I am a strategist and I do know when to assemble an army and when to make alliances. Upon my arrival, the half-breed yells, the miko subdues him and the rest of the pack stay at a respectful distance. The miko thinks I have a very good plan and welcomes me with a heart-stopping smile. I find myself mesmerized by that smile and realize that it is the same smile she gives to Inu Yasha. Does she still believe she owes me a favor by saving her from Mukotsu's attentions? Perhaps, but I will not ask. If she chooses to tell me, I will listen.

It is far into the evening when I leave the camp, promising to return with Jaken and Rin. The kit seems very ecstatic about having someone close to his age to play with. I still do not know whom the kit believes he is fooling. By his scent, I would say he is close to thirty summers but in youkai years, he is still very much the child. Upon my return, I let the miko take Rin's sleeping form from my arm and place her inside the strange futon.

It does not take them long to fall into a slumber and I stand at a distance discretely watching the young woman. She looks so peaceful in her sleep. I ponder over the meetings I have had with her in the past, and though I hate to admit such a failing, I know I have given her my ice walled heart. When this happened, I do not know but I have no choice but to wait and see if she will accept it.

The scent of grave soil and bones mixed with the tang of herbs reaches my nose and I quickly look at the tree where Inu Yasha is laying. He is sitting up; looking longingly in the direction it is coming from. My anger peaks when he leaps from his branch and starts walking into the forest.

"You will leave your potential mate unprotected." I say.

The hanyou looks at me with a frown on his face. "What mate?"

I gesture to the girl sleeping next to the children.

"She's not my mate Sesshoumaru." He says quietly.

This has taken me by surprise but I hide it well. "She is not your mate yet you become angry when the wolf prince comes forth and pronounces his claim. I fail to understand this."

"There's nothing to understand, I don't love her."

I sense that the miko is no longer asleep and is listening to our conversation.

"You do not love her, have no intention of mating with her and yet you forbid her to have a choice." I respond.

"She can go to whoever she wants."

I can tell that Inu Yasha is becoming angry at my words but I persist in finding my answers.

"So you will deny her a mate while you are free to take whomever you choose? Such dishonor is not befitting one of our father's blood."

"Go to hell Sesshoumaru!"

I watch silently as he runs into the forest and turn away from the camp. The wind shifts and the light smell of salt reaches my nose. I despise him and his uncanny ability to make her cry but I make no move to offer comfort, it is not my way. I will let her think that I believe she is asleep. I know that she would be humiliated if I were to confront her, I do not wish that on one so pure.

The morning came and with it came a slightly disheveled Inu Yasha. Unfortunately, the wind had shifted during the night and brought their scents directly to my nose. It was disgusting, knowing that my sibling was doing something so vile with the undead miko. I was having difficulty keeping my emotions in check. The camp woke up but the girl, Kagome did not look very happy. Some of the sparkle was gone from her expressive blue eyes and I cursed Inu Yasha for killing that part of her.

This is the day we found Naraku.

The undead miko had come to offer her help against the evil hanyou and Kagome let her. I watched as another part of her died. My half brother was so engrossed in his corpse that he did not see the pain he was causing. The rest of the pack did and tried talking with the hanyou but he would not listen. When we found Naraku, it was a battle for the ages, though rather short. Kagome made the final blow against him and gathered up the jewel that started this whole fiasco. When she placed the purified jewel in the hanyou's clawed hand she immediately turned and slowly walked away.

She did not smile in light of our defeat against Naraku. In less than a day Inu Yasha destroyed what little bit of happiness she had without even realizing it. The jewel suddenly shined brightly and the corpse gasped in awe and wonder. I could no longer smell the scent of death on her; she was alive. She laughed and threw herself into Inu Yasha's arms.

I ignored them, as did the remaining members of the pack. We were all looking in the same direction Kagome had gone. I did not show it but I was concerned for her. I could smell her tears on the wind and growled low in my chest.

"Dishonorable whelp!" I snarled, surprising myself.

Inu Yasha's smile instantly vanished when he finally caught wind of what I could smell. I turned my back on Inu Yasha with the vow that after this I would make every effort to never cross paths with him again. He could keep the Tetsusaiga; I had found a treasure far more valuable than the power that rusted katana ever possessed. I heard the Taijiya and monk fall in step behind me with the fire neko walking behind them.

It did not take us long to find her. She was curled up on the ground at the base of a tree, crying silently as if afraid someone would see her like this. I decided that I did not like the way her face scrunched up while she cried. I gently lifted her in my arm, my tail wrapped securely around her legs and continued on to where Ah Un, Jaken and Rin were waiting with Kagome's kit. We traveled to Inu Yasha's forest at Kagome's request and stopped at an old well in the center of it. She startled me by jumping into it. I do not know what she was thinking of but I heard a thud followed by a long wail of grief. The monk decided to explain to me what the well had been to her.

I retrieved her and followed the monk and taijiya to the village where the old miko was waiting for them. Inu Yasha arrived a few hours later and I refused to look at him, my concentration on Kagome, who had yet to let me go even in an exhausted slumber. I growled low in my throat when he approached to talk with her, warning him that he was not to come near until she woke.

I find that I do not wish to release her but know I must when she awakens. I am wondering what she will do now that her only route home is no longer open. My thoughts turn to Rin and I wonder. The sun is now peaking over the horizon and Kagome has yet to release me. I know she is awake but she has not pulled away from my embrace, if anything her arms have tightened around me. I sigh inwardly and place my hand on her shoulder to push her away but her arms tighten even more; that is when I smell it. She has begun to cry again. Her head is bowed low and what is not covered by her hair is hidden against the collar of my haori. She does not wish for anyone to see her tears.

The rustling of fabric reaches my ears and I glare into the open eyes of her tormentor. His gaze is on her small form, the expression is one of curiosity. I finally understand that he does not know the reason for her tears. Anger finds its way to me once more and, holding the girl close, I stand and leave the small dwelling. I hear the hanyou quickly extract himself from his mate and follow me outside.

"Where are you taking her Sesshoumaru?"

I suddenly have the insane urge to laugh at the audacity of his question but remain impassive. The miko lifts her tear streaked face to look at me. I can see the curiosity in her eyes and reinforce my hold on her.

"Are you taking me away?" she whispers.

"Yes."

She smiles; I see the sadness beneath and vow to remove it. When she opens her mouth, again the words that tumble forth shock the rest of her pack that have now congregated behind us and me as well.

"I wish I had met you first." She admits tearfully. "You would have killed me."

"Damn right he would have killed you." The hanyou yells. "That's probably what he's going to do now if he doesn't put you down!"

"Good," Kagome whispers. "I don't want to live in a world where I have no place."

"I will make one for you." I respond softly and start walking once more. I wish to put as much distance between Inu Yasha and myself as possible. In my mind, I can think of nothing except how to heal her heart and earn the feeling she gives to such an undeserving creature.

"What the hell are you talking about Kagome?" Inu Yasha yells, making me growl low in my chest. "You're not going anywhere with him."

I feel Inu Yasha grab my arm, loosening my hold on Kagome and nearly dropping her. A snarl builds and I turn toward him, reinforcing my hold on my precious cargo once more. I feel my youkai rise to the challenge and know I have begun the transformation. With every ounce of willpower I possess, I rein it back in. The hanyou has now moved back, his eyes tell me he knows he has overstepped his boundaries.

"Kagome will go where she chooses." I respond. "If she chooses to return, I will let her. Until that day comes, she will never experience the torment you have forced her to endure again."

"What torment?" he asks and I can plainly hear the sarcasm in his tone.

"Why don't you just shut up for once?" the taijiya demands, looking at Inu Yasha. "If you don't know what torment Lord Sesshoumaru is talking about now then you probably never will."

I smell tears again and am surprised to see Inu Yasha's resurrected miko the one who sheds them.

"Inu Yasha, did you make her believe you wanted her?" she asks softly.

I watch as Inu Yasha lowers his head, my heart swelling with triumph

The miko, Kikyou, sighs wearily and nods in my direction. "You will take care of her?"

I do not answer, after all she has done I do not feel she is worthy of it.

"Can she come and visit?" the taijiya asks hesitantly.

"I will send for you when she desires your company."

The monk seems very pleased with this answer, perhaps he knows what my true intentions are. My eyes land on the kit, who is staring at us with a silently pleading expression.

"Come," I say and turn back to the forest once more.

I hear the kit match my pace as we walk away from the village. Just before we reach the edge of the rice fields, Inu Yasha's voice rings through my ears.

"I guess you're the better brother after all."

I do not turn back to acknowledge his revelation. Instead, I continue on with the kit, who is silent and does not complain of my pace though I can see he is still fatigued. Kagome has taught him very well.

Rin and Jaken are waiting patiently and I hide my smile when Rin rushes to embrace my leg, asking if Kagome is going to stay with us.

"If she wishes." I answer and look down at her expression.

She is looking at me in curiosity. I can still see the sadness in her eyes and aura but what is this other emotion I see? Hope? I will not question it, nor will I ignore it. I collect the power around my feet, feeling the cloud form and solidify. Rin and Jaken have retrieved the kit and are astride Ah-Un. The soft Autumn air swirls around us and I feel Kagome's arms tighten around my neck.

It will take time for her to open her heart but I know I will accomplish it. I will repair what the hanyou has broken though it will take time. A soft noise brings my attention back to her face and I see she is sleeping soundly against my chest. She is so trusting but I prefer to believe she knows I will not harm her...ever.

Another rare smile appears on my expression as I look toward the future. It is a future filled with wonder, magic and the promise of a family. I will give this to my Kagome and much more. Anything to see her eyes sparkle with the love she had shown for the hanyou directed at me.

***

Okay, this is a one shot I'd had saved onto my computer for a very long time but just never got around to editing it. I do apologize if the tense Sesshoumaru used was confusing. I tried to keep it all in a single person POV. Believe me...it wasn't easy. Let me know what you all think.