Hi there, I could tell that you do not write often. I don't know if this is your first story or not so that's why I say that. The plot wasn't bad, it was a very good plot. The only things that I have to say about it are tone it down a bit. Figure out how you want the story to play out and begin from there. I think if you included a flashback of the night they broke up the reader wouldn't be confused as to why Kagome is so sad. Other than that I think you did a good job so far. Oh and be a little bit more descriptive, that's all! Thank you for this oneshot! :3