| A couple of missing commas and a spelling error or two, but no glaring errors. Everything is progressing nicely. Good job. The only thing that threw me off a little was when she's heading back to the village to gather supplies, and you wrote 'Kagome skipped along the path back to the village with vigor, in such a trance she’d been in, she hadn’t realized she’d traveled so far from the village.' The part that reads 'in such a trance she'd been in,' is a little off, in my opinion. I understand what you're trying to say, but the way it's worded doesn't make sense. Not saying you've gotta change anything, but it interrupts the flow a bit. Even putting 'having been in such a trance' instead (or something of that nature) would make it a lot smoother. Don't take that the wrong way. It's constructive criticism, I'm not bashing the quality of your work or anything. It's a good read.    
 | So far it looks great! Interesting premise, and good flow. Very valid points made here; the whole human/demon rivalry is just a bunch of contradictory BS. Props, hon!    
 | I like it, please update soon    
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