A/N: So I've been wanting to do a story like this for some time, and I think now is the time to actually do it. For those of you who are reading Once a Year, please know that I am not giving up on it. I thought that if I started another story, it would help encourage me to finish Once a Year, which is my main priority at this point. Think of this as my attempt to get rid of my writer's block :) And I would also like to say that this story will get a lot better as it progresses, so please bear with me!
Hope you like it!
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Chapter One: A Soul's Sorrow
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"Stop comparing me to her! How long is it going to take you to realize that I am not Kikyou, Inuyasha?"
"I know you're not Kikyou!" His ears drooped slightly. "It's just. . .sometimes. . .when you look at me, all I can see is her."
Kagome immediately stiffened. "And have you ever stopped to think about how that affects me?" she screeched. "I can always tell when it's her you're seeing. The way your eyes change. . .it gives you away every time."
"Kagome. . ." Inuyasha's tone was pleading. "Please- "
Kagome cut him off. "No. I don't want to hear it anymore, Inuyasha. I've had enough. You're too blinded by your feelings for Kikyou to understand how she has changed, what she has become. She's not the woman you knew fifty years ago. Whatever love she had for you is gone. The only thing that keeps her bound to this earth is her hatred for you!"
"She may hate me, but the feeling is definitely not mutual!" Inuyasha barked. "Kikyou died because of me. How can you expect me to just forget her?"
Kagome's face flushed brilliantly. "I never said you had to forget her, but that doesn't mean you have to be with her either. In case you've forgotten, Kikyou's greatest desire is to drag you to hell. Can you honestly say you'd willingly follow her into the netherworld and leave you life in this world behind? Leave Sango, Miroku, and Shippou behind?" She spun away so he wouldn't see the tears gathering in her eyes. "You would leave me?"
Sighing heavily, Inuyasha whispered, "Kagome, it's not like I have a choice. It's the least I can do after all the pain I caused her. She deserves my life."
Kagome turned so quickly, he thought she was going to topple over. "And what about you? What about what you deserve? You certainly don't deserve to go to hell! Quite the opposite, if you ask me. Besides, Naraku is the one who killed Kikyou, not you. He's the one who caused her all that pain. The bitterness she's directing towards you is totally misplaced!"
"Look Kagome, my mind is made up." Inuyasha stood and pushed the hut's door flap to the side. "Nothing you say is going to change that."
She watched him leave, her heart heavy. He obviously wasn't going to listen to her, so what was she supposed to do now? Pretend to be supportive as he threw his life away? Wish him the best of luck as he followed Kikyou into purgatory? There was no way she could do that!
Beyond depressed, Kagome wrapped her arms around her knees as she stared into the fire, finally letting her tears run freely down her cheeks. Thoughts raced inside her head as she looked into the flames, the warm orange color so similar to Inuyasha's eyes. Exhaling sharply, she forced herself to look away. She knew what she had to do. It would be hard, but it was her only option at this point and, in the long run, it would be best for both herself and Inuyasha.
It was time to let him go.
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Stars dotted the moonless night sky, twinkling brightly from the heavens. Inuyasha looked up at them from his place beside the Bone Eater's well and frowned. 'Stupid stars,' he thought. 'They have it so easy. . .'
He threaded one hand into his hair and examined the obsidian locks between his clawless fingers. 'Damn this mortal body. Not only is it weak, but I'm so overcome with human emotion it's almost too much to bear. That argument with Kagome. . .it never would have happened if it had been any other night.'
Dropping his hand to the ground, Inuyasha looked to the stars once more. 'Kikyou. . .I know she's not the same. Her spirit is completely different from how it used to be, but I just can't bring myself to move on. She was the first person besides my mother who ever loved me, despite the fact that I'm a half demon. There's no way I can forget everything she did for me.'
"Oh. So you've transformed already."
Inuyasha was pulled from his musings by the soft voice of Kagome. "Oh, hey. Didn't see you there, Kagome."
She offered him a small smile. "Mind if I sit with you for awhile? I'd like to talk, if that's okay."
Blinking, it took Inuyasha a minute to answer. "Yeah. . .sure. Come on."
Her smile widened and she took a few steps forward and sat down next to him, wiggling until she found a comfortable spot.
After settling herself beside him, Kagome crossed her arms and stared off into the surrounding trees. She was quiet for so long that when she finally decided to speak he nearly jumped out of his skin.
"The first time I ever came to the Feudal Era, I was beyond terrified. I'd just been attacked by a giant centipede woman and I had no idea where I was or what was going on. When I saw the Sacred Tree after I climbed out of the well, I ran towards it without even thinking. I knew I had to be close to home. And that was when I saw you."
The hanyou's eyes widened marginally but he kept quiet, wanting to hear what she had to say.
"At first, I thought you were just asleep in some really weird position or something, but then I saw the arrow sticking out from your chest and I didn't know what to think." She chuckled. "You know what happens next."
Inuyasha smirked. "You sure do know how to attract trouble, that's for sure."
She smiled again, but it quickly faded as she continued her story. "I've been with you ever since and we've gone through so much together in these last three years. You're my very best friend and I want nothing more than your happiness, even if it means I have to forsake my own."
'What does she mean, 'forsake her own'?' Inuyasha's brow furrowed. 'What in the world is she talking about?'
She turned to look at him. "From the moment I found out that I was Kikyou's reincarnation and the feelings you had for her, I guess I thought that our meeting was more than just coincidence. I felt like this was Kami's way of giving you and Kikyou a second chance, but when Urasue resurrected her I knew everything was going to change. And I was right."
Inuyasha flinched violently, but kept his silence. He knew she had more to say.
Kagome leaned her head back and sighed. "I know there is no room in your heart for me, Inuyasha. There's no way I could ever compete with Kikyou. I know that." She laughed humorlessly and Inuyasha felt his heart clench. "Why settle for the copy when you can have the original, right?"
Shocked by her words, Inuyasha reached forward and gripped her wrist, forcing her to look at him. "How can you say that, Kagome? You know you're important to me. I never would have been able to do any of this without you. I need you with me."
She gave him another smile. "I know I'm important to you Inuyasha, but not nearly as important as Kikyou. I doubt you'd be willing to go to hell for me."
"K-Kagome. . ."
"I didn't mean to upset you!" she said after seeing the expression on his face. "I'm just stating the truth. And you know it's true."
The guilty look in his eyes was answer enough.
She ignored the painful twinge in her heart and pulled her wrist away from him. "So, with all that said, I'm going to tell you the decision I've come to."
He quirked a brow at her. "And that is. . ."
"I'm not going to stay here and watch you give up everything you've worked so hard for." Inhaling deeply, she steeled herself for what she was about to do. "I won't watch you be killed for absolutely no reason. I won't be able to take it. So, I'll keep helping you find jewel shards and look for traces of Naraku, but once the final battle is over and the jewel is purified Inuyasha, there is one thing I can assure you."
"What's that?" he asked, obviously confused.
She released another sigh before pushing herself up off the ground and walking a short distance away from him. "No matter what happens, whether I am forced to remain here in the Feudal Era or to return to my time, I'll make sure you never see me again."
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A/N: Thought I'd be mean and leave it there :P
Please tell me if you guys liked it. Pleeeeaaasssseee!! I really would like to hear what you have to say, although. . . If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all!!!!!! Haha, but seriously though, don't, or I'll have to go all ninja on you, and you do NOT want that! :D Can you tell I've had sugar today??????
Til next time!